The Power of God

The Power of God presents itself as a bootleg copy of iron man 3, once acquired the wielder is granted unparalleled divine power, these powers include:
 * The will to live
 * The Ability to game-end Haggarty
 * Control the speed at which lobsters die
 * Kill Oprah Winfrey at anytime
 * Turn wine into water
 * Ability to produce Jammy Dodgers from any orifice
 * The Ability to unban Greggers from Sub-Rosa

This Artifact was famously used by Skim Shady to defeat Haggarty in the battle for the stalls before it was destroyed by its own power
 * The ability to know obscure LOTR characters (for example Tom Bombadil)
 * Sprite
 * Advance time 2 seconds into the future.
 * The ability to yote beings at the speed beyond light.